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Apr 28, 2008 6:25 pm US/Pacific
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Mysteries Of 'Big Brother 9' Solved! Sorta!
Who Had Sex? Where's Neil? Does Chelsia Know About...The Porn?
LOS ANGELES (CBS) ―
You have questions and we have answers.
We think.
We're talking of course, about our favorite water cooler show, "Big Brother" and this particular installment of the popular CBS show, BB9, left us with many questions. You, as well...judging by some of your E mails.
So, here in the interest of solid journalism (and because we are just feeling kinda nosy) we tackle some of the mysteries of the BB9 house...and ferret out the truth! Or what we believe to be true. Or what someone told us.
WHERE IS NEIL? WHAT HAPPENED TO NEIL?Neil, who was supposed to make up one half of the gay couple (Joshuah being his other half), left the show abruptly with the only explanation given that he left for "a family emergency." Even the cast is in the dark as to what really happened. "One minute he was there, and the next he was gone," Joshuah told us. The two had just sucked face for the first time...and poof, Neil went bye-bye. "That gave new meaning to the word 'quickie'," quipped Joshuah. Whatever happened, Neil wasn't even given time to say goodbye to the other houseguests.
Jokes aside, the rumors range from Neil lost his mother in a car accident to he lost a cousin during a school shooting. Joshuah said, "Whatever it was, I hope he is O.K. And I want him to know I wish him and his family the best."
WHERE WAS THE JURY SEQUESTER HOUSE?All Matty could say "Cause I'm not allowed to say", was that the house "was owned by a former major league baseball player." The house is described as opulent and has many wild features, like an outdoor water slide. Hmmm. Jose Canseco is a reality show fan and has been on several reality shows. His home was recently up for sale. His house has a water slide. If we were to deduce here, we would say the Canseco house was a good bet.
WHAT'S THE TWIST OF BB10?Not so fast, people. The slop from BB9 is barely cold. We do know the show will start airing July 10th. Executive producer Allison Grodner told CBS2.com that the next show's casting is "underway and almost complete." And what exactly will be the twist that will turn everyone inside out?: She wouldn't tell! But Grodner did tease "You will love it!" We do know that the cast will be more age diverse than the mostly 20-somethings of BB9.
WHAT BECOMES OF THE LITTLEST HOUSEGUESTS?People want to know what's going to happen with the hamsters. Logically, they should go to Sharon, the house resident Earth mother who fed the little hams (the ones in the cages, not her houseguests) every day like clock work. "They knew my voice," Sharon squealed to us, "those are my babies! I don't know what's going to happen to them! But I want them!!"
DID THE HOUSEGUESTS KNOW "CRAZY" JAMES WAS IN A GAY PORNO...OR TWO OR THREE?No. But James did reveal to us that everyone in the house knew -- including Chelsia -- that he had had sex with men and considered himself a bisexual. "They just didn't know I did it with men on videotape," he chuckled. James did not know that his Internet nickname was "Big Brother 9.5" but he laughed wildly when we told him. "That's great!"
WHY WERE JAMES' TATTOOS DIGITALLY PIXILATED ALL THE TIME?On closer inspection, it's a wonder they allowed James to EVER take his shirt off. Let's just say ... not only is our favorite Crazy houseguest inked in many places ... he has an eye and mind for controversy. On his shoulder one sees an image of a priest, about to shoot himself in the head, who is contemplating two young boys having sex at the same time. Under his Brawny tattoo (and they showed the Brawny part on TV) there is a expletive we cannot repeat. Let's just say it starts with the third letter of the alphabet and it's what Joshuah called Amanda. Yup, that one. On James's buttock is the phrase "I am God."
WHO HAD SEX IN THE HOUSE?
Uh, it would be easier to say who didn't. Jen quickly volunteered that she and Ryan had a brief tryst in the bathroom for all the show's staff to see. "I think it was 14 seconds," she laughs. (Internet watchers clocked the act closer to 30+ seconds). Natalie says she and Matt never hooked up, just a lot of kissing. His retort, uh, the best we can translate on this family-friendly website: Natalie was often his undercover angel. "It was a lot more than kissing. And a lot more than twice!" Joshuah dealt with sexual tension by finding a special place in the HOH bathroom shower away from the prying eyes of the cameras.
"Crazy" James liked to walk around in his birthday suit even on days when it wasn't his birthday. The producers only asked one thing: don't jump on any houseguests when you are naked. He loved jumping on Chelsia that way. She and Natalie reciprocated with a sexy striptease that involved whipped cream among other accoutrements.
HOW DRUNK WAS EVERYONE DURING THE (IN)FAMOUS POOL ORGY?Not drunk at all apparently, just bored. Entertainment Weekly called the BB9 cast "the trashiest cast" in TV history for a reason. And it didn't take alcohol for these folks to have a good time. Amanda laughs, "It's hard to get too drunk on the two beers you get...all week." Alex said, "I don't even drink! I was just in a mood to make out with everybody." He wasn't kidding. He kissed (with heavy tongue action) just about everyone in the house that night save for the men. Joshuah said, he wasn't drunk either, maybe a little tipsy. "Half the time we got wild," he explains, "it was because...well, there is a lot of time to fill. It's literally showtime (BB After Dark aired on Showtime 2) and you know they didn't want to see a bunch of people sitting around reading."
For her part, Chelsia is already worried about the fallout at home. The famous Natalie and Chelsia strip was done on her dad's birthday. "Sorry dad! I'm pretty sure when I get home they are going to lock me up!"
WHO FEUDED WITH WHO?(Who didn't?) When they weren't making out, these houseguests had to do a lot of making up. Just about everyone picked a fight with someone else at some point.
The highlights of the feuds: Chelsia thought Natalie was holier-than-thou. And not bright. Natalie thought Chelsia was unusually mean and cruel. Allison thought Ryan was too good for Jen. Jen thought Allison was a pain -- and stuck up. And Jen thought Allison was trying to move in on Ryan.
Sharon was mad at Jacob for cheating on her. Jacob thought Sharon's family hated him. Alex accused Amanda of ruining his game. Amanda thought Alex wanted her, a little too much, even after she told him she wasn't into him. Alex really blew his stack when Amanda suggested to her houseguests that Alex was trying to force himself on her sexually. Alex stopped liking Parker when he found out Amanda had a thing for Parker.
Parker thought Ryan was a loud mouth. Ryan thought Parker was jealous of his relationship with Jen. Joshuah shocked the house, and pretty much most of the nation, when he said Amanda "should hang herself...like her dad." Harsh x 100? She had just told the house her dad had committed suicide by hanging. He also lambasted Amanda calling her the c word and saying she was "ugly like a horse."
Parker hated that Sheila trash-talked Parker
after he left the house. Joshuah thought Amanda ran her mouth too much. Amanda thought Joshuah was a little too stuck on himself. Sheila thought Allison tried to throw her under the bus. Sheila thought Chelsia was mean and immature.
James blew up at Sheila when he caught her praising him one moment and plotting to evict him behind his back. He called her the c word. Jen accused her own boyfriend, Ryan, of being racist. She later insisted she didn't really mean "racist" against all blacks, just one guy black guy in particular she had dated. (You following all of this? There's more.)
Amanda was ticked -- okay, very ticked -- to discover the remaining houseguests thought one of the twists was that she was actually born a man...as in A-man-duh! While many participated in the speculation about her sexuality, she thought Chelsia and Matt carried it way too far. And rudely. Joshuah lashed out at Allison for a variety of reasons, mostly about her manipulative game play, and vowed, his hand waving in her face, to make her life "f---king miserable." She later accused him of almost hitting her and asked the producers to tell him to back off.
Chelsia and James thought "Team Christ" were a bunch of hypocrites, many of them reading the Bible and not understanding half of what they were reading. Matt derisively called James "the kid with the pink hair."
Joshuah thought Allison and Sheila went too far with the faux lesbian twist, and especially thought Allison did it to be hurtful to him. Joshuah also thought Natalie was a bit of a hick and hated her clothing and just about everything else about her. Most of the people in the house Joshuah called "complete losers." Ryan and Adam thought Natalie was playing them. When Natalie confessed to Sheila that she had the boys' backs, Sheila turned on Natalie and voted her out, something Natalie says she will have to try very hard to forgive.
Now that the dust has almost settled, it's time for BB10! Set your calendars, July will be here before you know it.
(© MMVIII, CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved.)